Last night as I drove to my Book Study it hit me. The question I have been asking God for the past few months was answered. You see a couple of months ago life in Haiti felt unsettling, like something wasn't right. I knew there were problems that needed to be fixed and I asked God for help. I asked God to bring us back to Canada because the things we were facing could only be fixed here. Yet after a few weeks being back I started saying okay God I am ready to go back now. I know that I might think I am ready but I most certainly know that God is not ready for us to go back quite yet.
One my biggest challenges I face is that I am very impatient person. When I think of something that needs to be done, I just automatically assume it should be done right away and be over and done with. Last night as I spoke to God and questioned Him, he reminded me that I wanted this. I wanted to come back to Canada to deal with these things and now what He is asking of me is to Be Still. He has been asking me to just stop and take time for Him. Yes there are things that need to be done but the most important of those things is that I take the time for Him and to just sit and be still in His presence. He wants me to wait for Him. He knows the timing of everything, His time is always perfect.
After my study last night I learned that maybe this is all so hard for me to do is because to do this I need to surrender myself to Him. I need to lay down the fear of what others are thinking while we are here. I constantly feel like I need to justify myself to those around me, almost to reassure them. But if I were to just surrender myself to Him, He will take care of those things for me. I don't need to worry about anything instead I can just pray about everything. (Phil 4:6)
So today as I go about my day, I want to remind myself that anything I feel is challenging me I can just lift it up to Him. He wants us to take that time with Him. These burdens we have are not too much for Him.